Following International Men’s Day last week, the government proudly unveiled a new mental health campaign aimed at helping men. Predictably, within hours of the announcement, certain MPs were already queuing up to recycle the same tired platitudes that have underpinned Britain’s disastrous approach to men’s mental health for the last decade.

When Labour MP Luke Charters declared that “vulnerability is not a weakness, it is a strength”, it was a perfect illustration of why public discussion on the subject has become so muddled and ineffective. If anything explains why male suicide rates remain so obscenely high, it is exactly this hopelessly misguided rhetoric that now passes for wisdom in Westminster.

For years, Britain has been governed by a liberal culture that treats masculinity itself as a social problem to be corrected. The fashionable belief is that men must become softer, more emotional, and more vulnerable. We tell them that strength is toxic, stoicism is outdated, and that the remedy for their distress is to spiral inward and open up at all times to anyone who will listen. Yet this ideology has not saved lives. It has made the situation far worse.

The Cruelty Behind the Kind Words

Many of the supporters of this worldview believe they are helping men. They speak of compassion, inclusivity, and emotional honesty. In reality, they have built a mental health strategy that encourages men to identify with their weaknesses rather than overcome them.

Telling men that “vulnerability is a strength” may sound compassionate, but it is intellectually hollow. Vulnerability is, by definition, exposure to harm. To pretend that weakness is a virtue is to deny the very mechanism by which human beings grow. No civilisation in history has ever taught its young men that fragility is the objective. Only ours attempts to do so, and we now live with the consequences.

When men hear this message, they are not emboldened. They are infantilised. Instead of learning to face hardship, manage emotional turmoil, and build resilience, they are instructed to normalise their worst moments and treat them as an identity. The result is a generation of men who are more confused, more despondent, and more directionless than ever before.

The Backwards Approach That Harms the Very People It Claims to Help

There are two equally unhelpful caricatures offered to men in today’s discourse. The first is the instruction to bottle everything up and remain silent. The second is the instruction to broadcast every passing emotion as if permanent fragility were a badge of honour. Both positions are absurd and destructive. Yet modern political culture presents these as the only two available choices.

The truth is that men do not need to be encouraged to dwell endlessly on their weaknesses. They need a path to overcome them. They need responsibilities, challenges, goals, and support that focuses on personal development rather than passive acceptance of despair. Anyone who has actually spoken to real men in crisis will know that they want guidance, not coddling. They want direction, not emotional exhibitionism. They want to feel useful, not trapped in a permanent state of self examination.

The liberal model of mental health denies men this basic dignity. It treats them as fragile objects who must be shielded from the very idea of toughness. It replaces discipline with sentimentality and resilience with vulnerability. It removes from men the one thing that has helped them navigate adversity throughout history, which is the understanding that courage is a skill that can be cultivated.

The Old Ways Failed Men Too

The old approach of bottling everything up and never speaking about problems was hardly better. That model produced generations of men who quietly deteriorated behind a rigid exterior, often leaving their families to deal with the fallout. But there is a vast difference between stoic restraint and emotional suppression. Men should have people in their lives whom they trust enough to be occasionally open with, whether that is a partner, a close friend, or a family member. Genuine connection is not weakness, it is simply choosing wisely where to place your vulnerabilities.

Professional support can also play an important role when life genuinely becomes overwhelming. Not every issue can be offloaded onto loved ones, nor should it be. In that sense, suicide helplines remain one of the most valuable resources available because of the anonymity they provide. They allow men to speak plainly without fear of judgement, offering a confidential outlet for thoughts they cannot voice anywhere else. In many ways they echo the purpose that confession can serve in churches, giving people a private space to unburden themselves to someone who will listen without interruption or expectation.

A Culture That Scorns Masculinity Cannot Claim to Care About Men

If society is serious about helping men, it must begin by acknowledging a simple but unfashionable truth. Masculinity, in its healthy form, is not the problem. Men need purpose, challenge, and the expectation of strength. These are not oppressive burdens but psychological necessities. Without them, men collapse into depression, isolation, and nihilism.

Yet too many influential voices insist on the opposite. They ridicule traditional masculinity while simultaneously instructing men to embrace their vulnerabilities as if this were the key to happiness. They tell men to reject stoicism at precisely the moment their lives demand it. They encourage emotional dependency while mocking any expression of masculine confidence. This is not compassion. It is a cultural trap that strips men of the tools they need to survive.

The Consequence Is Written in the Statistics

Male suicide continues to be one of the greatest public health catastrophes of our time. It is the leading cause of death for men under 50. Almost three quarters of all suicides in Britain are male. If this were happening to any other demographic, government institutions would treat it as a national emergency. Yet year after year, the same tired slogans are repeated, and the problem worsens.

We should be honest enough to admit the obvious. The modern experiment of reshaping masculinity into a soft, apologetic, perpetually vulnerable state has failed. Telling men that weakness is strength has not saved them. Treating emotional fragility as an identity has not empowered them. Shaming men for being masculine has not made them happier. If we want to help men, we must stop lying to them.

Strength Is Not Toxic. Weakness Is Not a Virtue.

A healthy approach to men’s mental health would draw from the wisdom of every successful civilisation that preceded us. Encourage stoicism, but not silence. Encourage emotional openness, but not emotional dependence. Encourage men to acknowledge their weaknesses, but not to live in them.

Most importantly, teach men that strength matters. Teach them that they can overcome hardship. Teach them that they have agency, responsibility, and the ability to rebuild themselves.

This is the opposite of what the current political narrative demands. But it is the only approach that has ever worked, and the only one that ever will.

Until we abandon the childish belief that masculinity is a pathology and vulnerability is a virtue, the crisis will continue. Men deserve better. They deserve honesty, not slogans. They deserve support, not infantilisation. They deserve a culture that respects the masculine virtues that have sustained society for generations.

What they have now is killing them.